By Matt Molgaard
I can only describe David Bernstein’s Witch Island as a paradox. There are great moments in the novel. There are terrible moments. I genuinely liked it… and I genuinely didn’t. In fact, I’m not sure I’ve ever been in that situation. There’s a cool idea here, but Bernstein repeatedly falls into traps that force him to crawl out again and try to re-establish the momentum he once had. Witch Island is a very, very strange novel.
Let me tell you the gist of this story: About 100 years ago, a woman was burned alive, and the local townspeople are terrified because everyone thinks she’s a witch. As they hang her, she unleashes an unexpected curse on the family of her attacker and their descendants. Fast forward a century, and a group of teenagers plan a trip to Witch Island, where they burned the old lady. It’s not long before an uncommon presence shows up, and these mischievous kids are about to learn that there might be some truth to the ghost stories circulating around town.
I like the idea of that. We basically know the general direction things are going. Who doesn’t like conceited teenagers being torn to shreds? It’s comforting stuff. I like witches, too; I married one. So, respect to David, he laid a good foundation. Unfortunately, that foundation withers and crumbles under the novel’s flaws. There’s a lot to be said for.
To me, there are two things that can completely ruin a novel. One is to ignore the details and then keep getting them wrong. The other is to follow a formulaic path and be careful from the first page to the last. Bernstein does exactly both. First, he seems to laugh at what some people consider myopic details, but I don’t think so. At the beginning of the story, we are made clear that there is nothing on the cursed island where the witch was burned. there is nothingThere were no birds chirping in the cold sky. Not a single ant moved toward the new farm. There were no creatures on the island. It was not until 70% of the way through the book that a young man felt mosquitoes on his arms and bugs and small animals under his feet. In the story, a character once referred to a marijuana cigarette as a “cannabis cigarette.” In real life, this In real life, I have never heard anyone refer to a joint as a marijuana cigarette. Is this really a minor issue? Yes. But I think David needs to read this stuff because he is a talented writer who (in my opinion) has a few minor holes to fill before he can really reach glory (I’ve had a really hard time, and if you want the 411 on self-destruction through toxins, for God’s sake you can ask me!). Anyway, I’m on the verge of going completely off topic. My other problem, as mentioned before, stems from a general lack of creativity. Witch Island defines formulaic. When reading this novel, I literally saw every step in the story two steps before it happened. No deviation at all. I liken reading Witch Island to watching Friday the 13thday Movie. You always know what’s going to happen next. No surprises.
You know what’s the weirdest thing about all of this? I loved this book! It held my attention. It’s effective, has a clear message, and is concise (I don’t think the novel is longer than 250 pages). Stories like this get me excited (although, I won’t be taking a boat to Witch Island anytime soon). Maybe it was the old-school vibe and nostalgic impact of the story that got me. Maybe it was the weird memories of early 80s camp movies. Regardless, I enjoyed this retro-styled work. Ultimately, I did enjoy the story. It may have its problems, but I encourage others to check it out.
Order yours here.
score:3/5
